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Woody Paige: Game most Nuggets fans could see turns out to be a horror show

KSE — Kroenke Stupidity & Embarrassment — blacked out the wrong Nuggets game.

(And here’s a nugget: Millions of Coloradans will be prohibited by KSE from viewing Game 5 on TV, either.)

The Trail Blazers’ blowout-walkover vs. the Nuggets Saturday afternoon should have been broadcast on the World Fishing Network, also owned by KSE, or belonged on a 10-inch black-and-white at Rack’em Billiards in Aurora.

The Nuggets might as well have played that farce in the dark. They didn’t deserve to be on a national network and in the same arena with the Trail Blazers. Anybody got two cans rabbit ears?

Nuggets partisans and the unwashed mass media in Colorado had believed that the team would roll home from Oregon as conquering victors like the Roman Army after decisively defeating the Carthaginians.

Especially if someone told them in advance that Damian Lillard would make only 1 of 10 shots — just 1 of 6 from beyond the 3-point line — LoDoers would have been planning to dance on Market Street on Saturday night.

Avalanche and Nuggets into the second round. No worries, no hurries. Bring on the Golden Knights and the Lakers, and let 35,000 people jam in The Jar.

Not so fast there, Bobo.

Rather, this NBA series has transformed into a best-of-three, flat-out, off-the-top-rope, no-holds-barred affair between virtually even antagonists.

Stop me if you’ve heard this again.

Two years ago the same franchises played in the postseason and split the first two games, the second set and Games 5 and 6 before reaching a seventh game at The Can.

The Trail Blazers won that series.

Here they are again.

Whatever side of the bed Nikola Jokic got out of Saturday morning was the wrong choice. And Michael Porter Jr. must have fallen out of his hotel bed.

The league’s Most Valuable Player looked like the Most Worthless Player in the fourth game, and the finalist for most improved player acted like the least improved bad actor.

Mr. Triple Double had twice as many turnovers as assists in Game 5. He produced a single-double in his worst effort in a big game this entire season. The Joker had averaged 36 points, 11.7 rebounds and 3.7 assists in the first four. His line Saturday was a joke — 7 of 18 from the field (1 of 4 3-point attempts), nine rebounds and one assist.

In plus-minus, he was a game-high 32 below zero in 27 minutes, and didn’t stay on the floor longer because the Nuggets were beaten like a garbage can in the Astros’ dugout.

MPJ was AWOL. Without Jamal Murray, the Nuggets must depend on Porter to be the No. 2 scorer and a force in every game. Yet, Michael has shown up as often as a bad rent check. In 23 minutes he took three measly shots more the building’s janitor. He was 1 of 3 on 3-pointers and didn’t even get one attempt inside the arc. Maybe he should have stayed in bed with five rebounds and two turnovers while not even playing a facsimile of defense.

Certainly, the loss was not all on Jokic and Junior. Facundo Campazzo did his best impression of Monte Towe, and Aaron Gordon and Austin Rivers disappeared. The bench was as active as a church pew, although JaVale McGee, who actually has won more championships than everyone else on the Nuggets combined, did seem to care in waste management time.

Meanwhile, Lillard could have taken a holiday off as everyone else contributed to the shutdown.

Carmelo Anthony enjoyed 12 points and ate cake. Good thing his 37th birthday didn’t occur in Denver. He would have been jeered.

The Nuggets had won Game 3 while the vast majority of Colorado folks again couldn’t watch because of bickering billionaires.

Another Colorado blackout is scheduled Tuesday night for Game 5 because the telecast will be on NBA TV once more and the foolish feud continues between Stan Kroenke and Comcast. Wonder why people in St. Louis and London hate Stan so much?

Kroenke isn’t talking, of course, but company flunky/COO Matt “Foul Mouth’’ Hutchings will speak as he did last week, accepting no blame and stating an abhorrent claim that should be a fire-able offense: “Comcast continues to hold Nuggets fans hostage by not allowing them to follow their hometown team.’’ Hutchings absurdly spelled the Portland team’s nickname Trailblazers, not Trail Blazers.

Go, Nuggets. Rediscover the light in spite of KSE.

Portland guard Damian Lillard, left, hits a shot over Nuggets guard Facundo Campazzo, center, and center Nikola Jokic, right, during the first half Saturday.
Portland guard Damian Lillard, left, hits a shot over Nuggets guard Facundo Campazzo, center, and center Nikola Jokic, right, during the first half Saturday.
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