In the most stunning development in the entire history of history the Rockies are signing free agent Kris Bryant to a seven-year, $182 million contract.

Bryant and the Rox believed they would be united in 2013. So, the Rockies finally get their man nine years later.

It could have been assumed that the Monfort Bros. & Sons (not to be confused with folk-rock group Mumford & Sons) would make one significant off-season expenditure — $200 mil to build a water world beyond center field.

Instead, the Rox acquire an All-Star third baseman-first baseman-outfielder-designated hitter-marquee quality player.

Goodness, gracious, great balls of fire!

The 30-year-old Bryant will earn more this year than Russell Wilson ($24 million) and Nate MacKinnon (a measly $6.85 million), but less than Nikola Jokic ($31.5 million).

The Hard Rox now seem like a baseball team.

That statement isn’t suggesting that the Rockies will win their first National League West title or become one of the sluggers in the 12-club playoff format, but they shouldn’t be the worst slugs ever in Colorado.

Bryant’s presence produces a product probably worth watching. And perhaps people will go to the ballpark for reasons other than picnicking in the sun, drinking beer and cheering for the opponents.

Kudos, for a rare change, to Dick Monfort, who reached his Tyrannosaurus rex-like arms into impenetrable pockets and pulled out cash.

On opening day April 8 against the Dodgers and starting pitcher Walker Buehler, the Rockies’ lineup will be: Raimel Tapia leading off and in left field; Brendan Rodgers at second, Charlie Blackmon in right, Bryant as the DH, third baseman Ryan McMahon, C.J. Cron at first, Sam Hilliard in center, Jose Iglesias at shortstop, Dom Nunez catching and pitcher German Marquez.

This is the franchise that, after reaching the 2018 postseason, has let go of All-Stars Nolan Arenado, Trevor Story, D.J. LeMahieu and David Dahl, catchers Chris Iannetta and Tony Wolters, starting pitcher Jon Gray and even short-term outfielders Carlos Gonzalez and Matt Holliday.

The Rockies have finished fourth in the past three seasons and compiled a 171-212 record (a cumulative total of 84.5 games out of first).

The organization can be proud that it picked Russell Wilson, a second baseman and a college quarterback, in the fourth round (140th) of the 2010 MLB draft. He thanked the Rockies Wednesday for his brief time in their minors before being selected by the Seahawks in the third round (75th) of the 2012 NFL draft.

Half the opening-afternoon roster for the Rockies, who promote a draft-and-develop philosophy, will be players chosen in previous drafts.

Bryant almost was with the franchise long before. In 2013 the Rox intended to draft him with the third overall choice. However, the Cubs surprising took Kris at No. 2. The Rockies then picked Jon Gray.

Rather than Gray and Story, the Rockies have Bryant. In 2018 he told a reporter in Colorado that he had expected to be drafted by the Rockies. “What a fun place it is to hit. Big outfield and mile high city. The ball carries.’’

However, the 6-foot-5, 230-pound Bryant, who was born in Las Vegas and became the college player of the year at the University of San Diego, hasn’t been overpowering in games in Denver (one home run) during his more than six seasons with the Cubs and 51 games last year with the Giants after being traded. Bryant, 2015 NL rookie of the year, made his fourth All-Star game appearance at Coors Field in 2021. Both he and Arenado, who’ve been compared since they arrived in the majors, went 0-for-2.

Bryant’s Rox contract is second to Arenado’s. Nolan signed an eight-year, $260 million ($32.5 million average) extension in 2019. Bryant’s deal, with no trade and opt out clauses, will average $26 mil. He made $18.6 million last season. Freddie Freeman has just agreed to go to the Dodgers for six years, $162 million.

Although a couple of other teams expressed interest in Bryant, the Rockies may have been bidding against themselves. Bryant’s career slash is .278/.376/.504 with 167 home runs and 467 runs batted in.

At least, the Rockies have done something special after promoting a Monfort son, firing the analytics director (who was not related) after only six months and signing a shortstop and a couple of pitchers.

Third place or bust. Hallelujah.